Just got home from watching this movie. I LOVED IT! Way more than I thought I would. My husband and I were part of Hillsong Church for five years and had our first two kids there. So I wanted to see the movie and maybe feel a bit nostalgic and maybe enjoy seeing God glorified in a secular movie theatre. But it was way more than that. OK the movie was very well done. I expected that from Hollywood. It was surprisingly positive in its presentation of Hillsong and the United band. It was surprisingly generous in the display of the hope side of the Christian message. Normally there is a lot of cynicism about Hillsong out in the world and parts of the church. But this wasn’t there. The behind the scenes look in to the band members personal lives was fantastic. It portrayed them as real people, not celebrities. I loved that it was clearly not about their egos, but about their desire to promote Jesus and allow people to connect with him. There were so many awesome moments in the movie – seeing people all around the world, singing ‘Saviour, He can move the mountains’. That was so well done – WOW was all I could say!! And then it just kept going on – I kept having all these moments with God – laughing and crying in his presence. Gobsmacked at what God had done with these ordinary people and how awesome he is. I just LOVED it! The movie is an opportunity for people all around the world to have a glimpse at who God is and hopefully be moved to want to connect with him and possibly a local church. And if that happens, they can discover the God who can set them free from all their inner turmoil, all the stuff we call sin that wraps people in chains. They can be forgiven, set free and live a new life with Christ to follow. I just LOVED that movie. Thanks Hillsong for all you’re doing and have done. Such an outstanding, extraordinary example. You lift our horizons. Thanks for your humility in this movie and for stating the truth – that without God it would all be nothing.
Category Archives: Inspiration
The Faith Switch
In the year 2000, I gave up trying to improve my Christian walk and I asked God to grow me. Since then, his work in my life has blown me away. I’ve learned that God is a brilliant mastermind, and that he can be trusted if I will have faith and patience.
This faith is a journey and I’m learning its power and activation. Here’s what happens to me over and over…
The Process
When I’m struggling with something… worrying… wrestling… wallowing, there’s no freedom. No power. But then suddenly I remember God. Hahaha. And then I KNOW he can deliver me from my turmoil. I KNOW he can turn my situation around. I KNOW he has a way to make the impossible possible (in the immediate and/or long-term). This KNOWING is called faith! It’s like I’ve just turned on a big switch – the power generator goes on and VWOOM… there is LIGHT!
Faith is a special type of knowing. It is supernatural. It is bigger than plain belief and beyond science. And it is not to be confused with hope, positive thinking or emotion. It is powerful.
Faith Is Bigger Than Belief
One can believe all sorts of things – that we evolved, that global warming is a problem, that one’s religion or absence thereof is the most accurate position. But such beliefs are not faith, even if they are religious in nature. Faith has a different switch.
Belief may be formed through education, reason, cultural or family heritage, etc, such as believing in God because of one’s upbringing. But this is not the faith I’m talking about. Faith is an alive explosion of inner knowledge that something is absolutely true, with no doubt whatsoever. Some call it assurance. Mix that with life and fire and we are getting somewhere.
I think if we could see both belief and faith, then belief would be like a smooth cold grey rock, sitting solid and still, and faith would be like a pulsating red hot rock, dangerous and alive.
Faith and Science
People of faith may or may not operate in the realm of scientific empirical evidence and facts. Scientific knowledge is useful and practical, but it has no bearing on faith. Faith is separate and distinct. Faith knows things that science cannot. Faith is an inner spiritual switch that everyone has, but not everyone knows how to operate. Those who have used the switch are more able to use it again. And those who use it frequently become adept at using it across multiple situations. And some amazing people live in this space most of the time.
Faith Is Not Hope
Faith can sometimes be confused with hope. Yes, hope is good. Hope keeps us going. We hope things will get better. We hope God will intervene. But faith is different – it KNOWS! The Bible says that “faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen” (Hebrews 11:1). Faith is not nebulous – it is itself a substance and an evidence. This is why someone who has faith needs nothing else to convince them. Faith trumps any other intellectual argument. Faith is its own argument.
Positive Thinking and Emotion
Some may think faith can be conjured up through positive thinking. It is the other way around. Faith may inspire positive thinking, but it is not the same thing. The difference is like costume jewellery versus gold and precious stones.
Some may see faith as a strong emotional feeling attached to belief. Again, it is the other way around. Faith may inspire strong feeling, but it is not the same thing. Strong emotion with belief can sing the worship song, “Bless the Lord O my soul, O my soul, Worship His Holy Name” and agree wholeheartedly with great emotion. Faith can sing the same line and each word starts living and breathing on its own. Life and energy flows. It’s like your spirit has woken up and arisen.
Faith is Massively Empowering
Faith can operate in any environment. It is not dependent on life being great and it is not disabled by life being difficult. In actual fact, difficulty can inspire faith to become stronger and more resilient. And in turn it empowers one further in the difficulty.
Faith changes the way everything looks. It reignites hope. And it crushes fear. It enables going forward and it disables paralysis. Everything lights up, not just one’s vision, but one’s whole inner being.
Faith shuts down destructive thoughts. One might have no idea how to handle a problem, but faith says, “I know my God is bigger than this problem and he will show me a way through. Whether today or tomorrow, I know he is faithful and I trust him with the timing and the method.” And then peace comes. And God is moved to action on our behalf.
How Do I Find The Faith Switch?
How do you activate faith? How do you find a switch that you’ve never pressed? I’m here to say that it is more than possible – and it is quite possibly the next chapter of your life.
What I’m about to say might sound simplistic, but it’s actually profound and involves an action which opens a new doorway. Here it is… (drum roll)… You find the switch by listening to God’s word… and somehow at some moment something profoundly ignites. The Bible says, “faith comes by hearing, and hearing by the word of God” (Romans 10:17). Anyone can do this…
- Start reading or listening to the Bible. (I suggest starting in the book of Mark).
- Google ‘Jesus gospel message’ and read/listen.
- Listen to people of faith talking about God.
And while you’re reading and while you’re listening, ASK GOD to give you faith. Ask him to reveal himself to you and turn that switch on. You actually can’t turn it on without him. (So – none of us WITH faith can boast and say we’re better than anyone else (Ephesians 2:8-9)).
And if nothing happens what have you lost? Some time and effort. Plus you’ve gained some extra life experience and knowledge.
But what if you actually activate the faith switch for the first time. I’m telling you – you will never be the same again!!!
Open the door!
An Open Letter To Australia
Dear Australia,
We are an incredible nation. From the natural Uluru to the master built Opera House, we display outstanding beauty. From the original inhabitants to the British settlers to later immigrants, we epitomise diversity, and enjoy its benefits. We are passionate, yet easy going, hard-working, yet know how to celebrate. We despise facades and welcome gut level honesty. So I probably won’t surprise you when I also say… we have some serious problems.
We see never ending domestic violence in the news. The victims suffer in body and soul, robbed of their safety and human dignity, tortured by ongoing emotional turmoil. The perpetrators also suffer – their inner freedom is destroyed by their own hatred and lack of self-control. We are also robbed of their exceptionality.
There is an increasing and pervading darkness. It is most obvious in the atmosphere of our movies – every decade is darker than the one prior. Compare a 1950’s movie to one today. This increased darkness is also obvious in our faces, in our eyes. There is a loss of innocence which stands out.
Our nation is blistering with porn addiction – a huge percentage of particularly men and boys are addicted to lust, driven for a hit, minds altered, innocence lost, robbed of intellectual creativity and freedom because of the addiction that stalks them. And we as a nation are robbed of their finery, of their purest contribution to family and society. Not to mention the many partners who suffer silent anguish.
We see a tsunami of depression. It’s everywhere. Depression sucks the life out of people, robs them of their capacity, their ability to flourish and change, learn and grow. THERE IS NO FREEDOM! We never get to see their best.
I could go on. Each one of us have our own story.
I have to ask… Why are we suffering? What is diminishing our capacity? Where is our inner freedom?
I would like to suggest that as a society we are reaping the fruit of walking our own way.
We sing the song, “I Did It My Way” and “It’s My Life”. We believe that no-one can tell us what to do. ‘It’s my life, my choice.’ And this is true. But we are reaping the consequences. And the consequences are too much!
There must be another way.
Our problems are too big for the government to solve. They are too big for the universities to intellectualise. The media can bring them to our attention, but they can’t change anything? We have millions of different opinions, but which voice do we listen to amidst the cacophony on the airwaves? Nobody has a monopoly on national perspective. Not one of us qualifies for the job!
I put it to you that there is only One who can fix our nation’s problems…
And that One is God.
He’s the only one that sees everything at once, every person, every problem, every pain and the interaction across the globe of all of these things, impact now and impact across the generations. The God that was smart enough to create the intricacies and inter-relatedness of life on the planet is smart enough to restore order, if we will listen.
When we want something done properly, we ask the experts. If God is the creator of our world, our brains, our emotions and our communities, then he is the ultimate expert, so why not find out what he says. Why belittle our potential by following our own myopic vision when we could follow the one who sees everything?
God’s way is very different to ours. The ancient Scriptures read,
“My thoughts are nothing like your thoughts,” says the Lord.
“And my ways are far beyond anything you could imagine.
For just as the heavens are higher than the earth,
so my ways are higher than your ways
and my thoughts higher than your thoughts.” (Isaiah 55:8-9, NLT)
But what are his ways? And how do we walk in them?
I challenge you to find out.
God’s way leads to inner peace, hope and personal freedom. And on a larger scale, to national peace and prosperity. God is good and his ways are right. He personifies love in its purest form, whilst standing firm on justice and truth. He is both holy and revered, gentle and personal. He holds the keys to abundant life and gives us freedom to grab a hold of them… or freedom to choose our own way.
Let’s use our freedom to grab the keys and change our direction. Let’s humble ourselves and admit we are wrong.
I challenge my country, from the politicians, to the workers, from the business owners to those living on welfare, from the students to those serving our community – let’s stop living life our own way and start living life God’s way. It’s a change of perspective. It’s a change of priorities. And it’s therefore a change of consequences.
Let’s be a nation that learns to seek God’s truth and apply it in all areas of life, in every sphere of the community, with all the fruit that entails. Let’s see every individual released into the uniqueness and brilliance of who they have been designed to be. Why wouldn’t we want this? Why wouldn’t we sacrifice everything, including our own false freedom for the true freedom that is available.
In the words of Isaiah, the ancient prophet:
“Seek the Lord while you can find him.
Call on him now while he is near.
Let the wicked change their ways
and banish the very thought of doing wrong.
Let them turn to the Lord that he may have mercy on them.
Yes, turn to our God, for he will forgive generously.” (Isaiah 55:6-7, NLT)
Please share this on social media and get the message out!
Mumma’s Wrath
OK this is not going to end up where you think…
I can have patience for a while with things that are out of order. When my kids do the wrong thing, they can get a gentle warning or reprimand. Then if they do it again, the intensity builds and maybe they get an annoyed telling off. Then if they do it again, well the fire heats up. And eventually, without an intervention from the interior grace department, mumma’s wrath comes to the fore!
Same thing with irritating things around the house. I can put up with the leaky tap for a while. My patience deals with it, as there are far more important things to put my attention to. I don’t want to waste time dealing with it. But it niggles. And over time it builds up. And then it gets to the point where – something’s going to happen or else!
The line has been crossed. The decision has been made. And this mumma has HAD ENOUGH!
Well. This is what I call the breakthrough the moment. The moment where change is going to happen. The moment where my will becomes very powerful.
And I apply this to the battles within my mind.
Sometimes I can have stupid thought patterns or habits that are like annoying background music. I put up with them because I am used to them. And I have far more important things to attend to. But there comes a moment – and this is gold – when I have had enough.
As an aside here – I wonder if this is why we get put through the pressure pot sometimes. Because God in his grace knows we are not going to let go of some of our junk, unless we have ‘had enough’. And he wants us to enjoy the freedom that he has on offer. So he sends some challenge our way to artfully guide us to the place of overcoming.
So back to the thought grind. Mumma bear starts growling and says to herself. I have had enough of this junk in my mind. I’m not tolerating this anymore. NO MORE! I’ve had enough.
Well I’ve done this recently with disrespect. I’ve been far too disrespectful in my attitude to my husband. I’ve been trying to change this for a long time, but I’ve just always gone back to old attitudes of thinking. And I’ve observed in my journey with God, that breakthrough doesn’t usually happen until I get to this point of ‘had enough’.
Well I’ve had enough of turmoil in our home. We have five kids, two with special needs. And we get a lot of turmoil at different times. It’s so challenging that I need to get rid of every stress that I can. So I’ve been praying for more peace. And this is what God is bringing to my attention. Respect. Ouchy ouch. Well, I decided I’ve had enough of being disrespectful, I’ve had enough of trying to change and failing. I want God’s way. And I want it to change NOW!!!
So now I’ve been turning the corner. I’ve been practising a new attitude. I’ve been practising respect. I read a short article recently about a Jew in a concentration camp who determined to respect their abusers. And I thought – well – what excuse do I have? It’s not about whether my husband’s actions or words deserve respect, but it’s about who I am as a person inside.
Well on this path, I have to admit that it is actually bringing more peace. Not only in our marriage. But it has done something in me, so that I interact with the kids now more respectfully, which brings more peace and less turmoil, as they respond better. And the fruit of this down the track will be that the kids will be more respectful to us and each other, and this will in turn bring more peace. It’s like the opposite of a vicious cycle. Keeps getting better and better. I’m on the path now – it’s onward and upward.
What path do you need to get on? What’s it going to take to activate your will to make a stand. Enough is enough. Here’s the line. No more!
Sexy is Inspirational
Being sexy is inspirational. Who do you want to inspire? Here’s a short video to consider…
60 Second Preach – Ask For Love
Welcome to the first ’60 Second Preach’. I hope to do a number of these. Short and sweet. I’m not sure what topics to expect yet. This one will encourage and build!
Ten Scriptures For Freedom
One of my absolute smashing favourite Scriptures is “I will walk about in freedom for I have sought your commands”. Haha. It seems like a crazy juxtaposition. Like saying I will be in raptures eating brussel sprouts! Are you kidding me?
But that’s what the Bible is. Crazy when you have no revelation. Well much of it.
But when you have revelation, it is gold and it is life and it turns everything on its head!
Here’s ten Scripture commands off the top of my head that bring freedom…
- Forgive seventy times seven (Matthew 18:22). Unlimited forgiveness means unlimited freedom. You’re not bound in bitterness. And your body doesn’t suffer as a result.
- Pray for those who mistreat you (Luke 6:28). Switches your focus to wanting your enemies good and their highest good, instead of ruminating on how awful they are. Path to freedom.
- Confess your sins (James 5:16). Aaaah. Get that guilt out. Get that load off your shoulders. Give it to the one who died for all of that dark stuff. Jesus can handle it. FREEDOM!!!
- Consider trials joy (James 1:2-4). Oh yeah. This one’s inspiring. Change your focus off the pain of the pain, to the gain of the pain. You get perseverance, maturity, completeness. Stuff that isn’t formed any other way.
- Remember the Sabbath (Exodus 20:8). Then you your body and mind will be rested, your spirit rejuvenated and you will function at a higher, more free level. God created us and wrote the manual for how we function best.
- Love the Lord your God (Matthew 22:37). Don’t just respect him. Don’t just obey him. Hahaha. LOVE him. Totally different. And not just the lipservice love. This is heart stuff. What do you really love? What gets you in the core of your being? What prompts your love? Now you know the answer to that, then learn to love God like this and then more and more and more. And as it happens more and more, God will give you grace to experience more of his love, and then you will love him a whole lot more. This is unlimited peoples. Wherever you are at, there is so much more. So much freedom in true love. Different motivation for EVERYTHING!
- Don’t commit adultery. Don’t look at a woman lustfully (Matthew 5:27-28). Oh man. So much pain, hurt, suffering, chains, bondage down that pathway. Looks great. So enticing. But so many lies from the enemy in baiting people here. Not the path for freedom. Heed the Scripture and you can walk in freedom. Flee from all this darkness and junk!
- Don’t lie (Colossians 3:9). Ooh yucky awful stuff here. Trust is eroded by lies. Trust of others, trust of yourself. No honour or freedom here. Heed the Scripture and let your lips speak truth. Freedom here.
- Don’t be anxious (Philippians 4:6). What did you say? You mean I have a choice? Yup! Not easy at first. But when you realise the power of your own will to boss your thoughts, there is liberation coming your way. Keep practicing. Imagine freedom of anxiety. Hahahaha!
- Worship the Lord your God and serve only him (Luke 4:8). Nothing greater than to express your adoration of the greatest. Single eyed, not compromised, all for one. 100% Jesus. When I was worshipping God during Sunday service this morning I imagined being in heaven and then I unleashed even more exuberance. Cos there is no shame there in giving him our utmost. What delight to worship him with everything. Freedom unsurpassed in this place. The only miserable thing about writing this, is reading back over it again and realising that unless you experience this it just sounds like an excited fan. How lousy to not be able to use words to describe the heights of intimate communion with God himself. Personal connection at the deepest place in our spirit and soul. It goes way beyond mental acknowledgment. Here I’m not only legally free but my whole being FEELS free!
An Open Letter to You
I often say to my kids, ‘how come you’re so gorgeous’. Sometimes they remember the answer… ‘because God made me’. Then I like to say, ‘God did a good job when he made you!’
And that’s what I want to say to YOU – ‘God did a good job when he made you!’ He didn’t stuff up. You’re not a half attempt. He’s the expert at making people. He’s the ultra creator, the masterpiece maker. And that’s what you are – a masterpiece.
So why hide? So why look down on yourself? Why try and fit in with everyone else. You are unique. You are amazing. You reflect the extravagance and amazing mind of the greatest being EVER.
Be who you have been made to be. Be all of it. Don’t hold back. Don’t let fear hold you back.
Unleash you. Hahahaha! YES!!!!!
Personally I find myself most free and most authentic in God. When I live and breathe in him, I get free. I become myself. Because God is my source, my creator and my enabler.
Why not draw from the life source. Connect with him. That’s where true freedom is! That’s where you find out who you really are.
*Lovely gold frame picture from www.doodlecraftblog.com
Refusing Fear
I’ve got an attitude towards fear. I’m cross with it.
Fear robs people of joy and robs people of peace. That’s very, very destructive. What a miserable party pooper!
I’ve observed something about fear. It starts with something that is true or partially true and it builds on it. This gets the person in agreement. And from this point it can build a nice little castle in the person’s heart. It gets bigger and bigger, bit by bit, slowly by slowly. Until eventually the fear can be quite irrational and overpowering.
I got cross with this fear. It’s not from God. It’s from his archenemy the devil, who actually exists and who wants to rob our lives of everything precious and wonderful. He twists truth and seeks our agreement.
ENOUGH!!! I’ve decided to stop agreeing with the fear. Hahahaha. This has been wonderful and part of my liberating process. So now what happens is… I see a fear… and then I think, but but but… it’s possible… this could happen… so I’m worried about it. And then I see – I’M GETTING ROBBED OF MY FREEDOM!!!!
Cos I realised something really powerful. Hahahaha. I DON’T HAVE TO AGREE with that fear ANYMORE!!! So I get an attitude. I get stubborn. I say NOOOOOOO!
Sometimes a conversation may go on in my head. I refuse the fear. Then it might pester me. At this point it actually gets fun, because I get like a little kid who is digging their heals in. “NUP. NUP. NUP. I don’t care what ‘truth’ you are telling me fear. You are not from God. And you are robbing me. So I don’t want A BAR OF IT.”
When I persist in my disagreement, the fear weakens and eventually goes away. And then I am FREE!
And the next time fear comes, I am stronger to face it. My fear refusal muscle is growing.
Abortion – Make The World A Better Place
Sitting in my chair I had a moment. And decided to record it…
Kudos to Candace Payne for recording such a beautiful version of ‘Heal the World’. I played the song on my iPhone as I spoke, as it set the atmosphere for what I wanted to convey. This world can be healed. This world can be a better place. We can approach the abortion issue with compassion and love, with value for all.
No Guilt
It’s a lovely feeling – the absence of guilt. Instead there’s freedom. And therefore joy. And relief.
Guilt is a horrible plague. It sucks the life away and keeps one in misery land. You can never achieve perfection and the guilt just rubs it in and rubs it in endlessly.
The guilty thoughts are based on truth so they are easy to embrace and believe. I should be a better parent, a better wife, a better friend, a better citizen. And so you should! Hahaha what a miserable answer! But you won’t be able to live up to your ideals no matter how hard you try.
Sometimes a perfect day appears. I’ve had them. I’m the perfect mother, responding with grace, wisdom, love, joy. Soothing everyone’s pain and dissolving arguments, cooking a great meal, perfecting household cleanliness and even managing sex at 11pm at night. So the standard is set and this must be maintained.
But it’s IMPOSSIBLE!
The next day you’re tired. You’re grumpy. You start off patient, but one of the kids tips you over too far and you yell. Then you feel guilty and so you act a bit kinder. But then later you feel guilty because you were too soft. You remember all the parenting rules you’re breaking and you feel guilty for that too.
I have a secret to tell. I’ve had God helping me he he he. And he’s an expert at taking away guilt. He’s been rather intent recently on bringing me to a place of freedom. It’s a really nice place to be. He gently challenges my ideals and teaches me to trust him and let stuff go. One thing at a time. He is pretty patient and very loving.
When I trust him to grow me I don’t have to feel guilty about how I am or am not being. I just focus on trusting him to bring me to where I need to be. He’s responsible. I just work with him and understand he has immense patience with me. I trust in his patience and in his love.
When I trust him to grow my kids, the pressure is off me. I’m not the ‘be all and end all’. Lots of people contribute to my kids’ development. And I see God’s hand directing things in their lives. Without this guilt, I’m a better and more loving mum. Still not perfect, but free. And I’m happy for my kids to have a free mum.
When I trust him to take care of my husband, I’m free from a lot of stress. Hahaha. That sounds really bad. But my interference never amounts to good anyway. My husband is way too free spirited and independent and very resistant of my attempts to bring him to my standards of perfection. And a good thing too. Hey, sounds like I’m talking from experience haha. Trusting God helps a lot.
When I trust him to direct me, I don’t have to feel guilty about what I am or am not doing. I’m free. And I know he directs and prompts me, so I can relax knowing I can trust him to steer the ship. My heart is set on him and walking in his ways. And I pray that he will keep me from falling. And I trust him and I don’t trust myself.
Perfect Scripture about guilt is this one: “Therefore there is no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus” (Romans 8:1). All our guilt has been wiped away. It got put on Jesus. That’s why he died. He did mighty thing in that moment so we could be free. When I put my trust in him, the guilt dissolves. He’s big enough to take it all. He’s big enough to handle my trust. So I am free.
20 Simple Mummy Helps
- Headphones
Why get stressed out by ongoing kid noise when you can wear headphones? It took me a while to cotton onto this one. I was too afraid that I would miss hearing something important, e.g. a safety issue. But the kids are old enough now to come to me if needed. And I can still hear noise, it’s just everything is muffled. Most of the time I don’t wear them, but when I need a break, or I need energy to go a little longer, they make all the difference.
- iPads
Thanks to Anglicare we got two iPads for Summer and Sarah. I’m not a fan of too much screen-time. My ideal is about half an hour a day during the week, and maybe an hour on each day of the weekend. I don’t live up to this ideal when I am overtired. And especially with Summer, if I don’t have carer support, the iPad is a big help for her and for me and for the rest of the family. Not feeling guilty, just accepting the season is not ideal.
- Rules
Kiara, Josiah and Micah love screen-time. But they’re not allowed their quota unless their jobs are done and their room is tidy. I love this rule. In the holidays I get to hear them having conversations – let’s tidy our rooms and do our jobs and then let’s play Minecraft. Hahaha. No intervention from me. Sorted! During term, there’s not so much free time, so they care less about screen-time and rooms can get messy. And I can get grumpy.
- 20 things
Micah can get overwhelmed with a messy room. After all he is only five. I caught onto a good thing again the other day. Recycling strategies that worked for the older two. “Just pick up twenty things then have a break. Then do another twenty things.” So every now and then during the day I’d say, do another twenty. He was pretty happy with this after seeing how easy the first twenty was. And then he became pretty quick. In the end he sped up as he wanted screen-time.
- Music
In the mornings I put on my favourite songs. For me it is a Youtube mix of Hillsong, Bethel and some other worship songs. Love it. It sets the atmosphere and helps me stay nicer.
- Chocolate
A couple of pieces of chocolate in the afternoon make me feel happy. But not too much, or they make my body feel depressed. Note to self.
- Nanna nap
I used to rest for 15 minutes every four hours. That was a life-line when the kids were pre-school age. Even if they were crawling on me I lay horizontal for 15 minutes. I set the timer. The only reason I did it was because God told me too and I love him so I obeyed. Now I have 20-30 minutes rest in the afternoon. Lovely, lovely, lovely. No guilts. Good for me. Good for everyone.
- Down time
Basic for some. It wasn’t for me. I used to work all the time, except for my scheduled rests (as above). I hated wasting time. This year I’ve learned to have down time. iPad game, puzzles, sitting and staring, eating, chilling, dancing, cuddling kids. The only reason I learned this, was because I felt God impressing on my heart that he wanted me to learn this, and I felt his pleasure at my freedom in this. Otherwise I would have written it off as time wasting and felt guilty. It took a while, but now I feel free and happy. Sometimes I have a LOT of down time.
- Checking in with God
I regularly check in with the Holy Spirit to see if he’s saying something, or to feel how he’s reacting. He often gives me ideas or promptings or confidence. Or if I feel unease, I wait and don’t do what I was thinking. This helps me more than anything else. He has knowledge and awareness that is way beyond me and my capabilities. It saves a lot of problems checking in with him.
- Lovely things
I’m gathering more and more things that I LOVE around the house. Hanging fake vines around our arch entrance, a big sky sticker on the ceiling, red chair in my office, beautiful pictures on the wall. I’ve found a new freedom in decorating. Instead of wondering what is stylish or culturally acceptable, I’m asking a different question – do I LOVE it? Now I feel happy every time I walk into each room. Joy producing.
- Sex with the husband
Definitely not with anyone else. That would wreck things. My friend describes sex as the glue for relationships. It eases tensions and fosters connection. Fun too 🙂
- Blue sky and white clouds
Imagine if it was grey all day, every day. Nope. We get ever changing sky scapes of exquisite artistry. Better than pictures on the wall. Now my kids have got the sky joy bug, pointing them out to me on car trips! I pulled over to take photos, but alas the pictures were lousy.
- After school care
I didn’t want to put any of my kids in after school care. That was for those who had to, because they worked. My attitude was that my kids need to be home after a full day at school. They need to be with me. This year I gave after school care a go for my two boys, Micah and Josiah in term 2. I only did it because if felt prompted to try it out, and wondered if it was the Holy Spirit prompting me. I was pleased to discover it was really cheap after the rebates were applied. And I was even happier to discover that the boys LOVED it! Way more than I expected. They got upset when I picked them up too early, so I worked out the best time so they were happy. This made a huge difference to my afternoon routine. Summer and Sarah are now able to come home to a quieter house and settle in with the carer. The boys get to have fun with other kids and don’t have to endure the stress of Summer’s entrance to the home. And I get longer to rest and recover from the adrenal crash I had last year. And my husband can work longer if needed and not stress about coming home to help with the kids. Wow. So simple, but making a big difference.
- The tuna meal.
One time when preparing to cook dinner I didn’t know what to do. I checked in with the Holy Spirit and got an idea for some ingredients. I didn’t think it sounded very nice, but thought I’d try it, as I’ve learned to trust Holy Spirit more than myself. Can of tuna, homebrand packet of chicken noodle soup, curry powder, coconut cream, frozen peas, frozen corn. Thrown in frypan together and heated. Served with cooked pasta. Five minutes to prepare and cook. HEALTHY. CHEAP. Actually VERY YUMMY. Well for me and the kids. (Kristin not so keen). In fact the kids REALLY like it! (Maybe your family won’t). But this has been a lifesaver when I’m over it and realise OH NO I HAVE TO COOK DINNER!!!
- Hot showers
LONG hot shower. No guilt. My Father God owns and supplies the water and pays the bills. Big sigh of relief for number 15!
- The Library
Three of my kids love reading. The older two get 40 books each and then disappear. More peace in the house hooray! Good for them. Good for everyone.
- The Salvos
Guilt free clothes shopping. More for your money. Half price on certain things on certain days. Today I found the perfect picture frame for a print I was going to have to get custom framed. $6 instead of $60? Lots of joy over that one!
- Divide and conquer
On the weekend Kristin takes Summer out with him in the car. I stay home with the other four. Or we swap it around. Changing it up gives everyone space and variety and definitely helps keep the peace.
- Buffer time
We used to be late most of the time. Now we are not perfect, but we are significantly improved. My maths is a little different. Instead of deciding the time we leave based on the best case scenario, I add in 5-15 minutes of buffer time. It makes all the difference.
- Twaddle
I get a bit silly sometimes, especially with the kids. I remember reading somewhere that playfulness is not friends with anxiety. As God has been cultivating more and more freedom in me, it is spilling out in fun stuff. Writing twaddle, dancing silly, pulling faces with the kids, just having fun. Definitely need and want more of this!
Love, Freedom, Truth
There’s so much wrestling going on in my mind. Love, freedom, truth. Over and over.
God is love. His love is SO good. It’s beyond our human experience. The Scripture oozes with examples and direct conveyances of his love. “How wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ” (Ephesians 3:18); “this love that surpasses knowledge” (Ephesians 3:19); “this is how we know what love is, Jesus Christ laid down his life for us (1 John 3:16). Etc, etc. Just google and you will find a GOLD MINE.
It hurts to know even a smidgeon of this love, and to know that so many have ABSOLUTELY no idea of the depth and the richness and the spiritually overwhelming goodness of this. It’s actually upsetting!
And the life giving Scriptures tell us that the world will know who Jesus’ disciples are by their love for one another (John 13:35).
That one upsets me too. Even though God has placed his love in our hearts, we often do a really lousy job of conveying this love. When we are in his presence it is easy. But then we can so easily slip into our old bad habits. We get cross, we get grumpy, we are not loving. SO frustrating!!!
But then we get his love dose. And when this happens, the outcome can be amazing. We can overlook the judgments, the insults, the kids’ bad behaviour, the stress. And love conquers all. It actually does. In moments like these, our soul is deepened in God’s strength. We become mighty overcomers.
I remember when my three youngest children were milling around me in the kitchen. Summer (the one with microcephaly and autism) was agitated, Sarah was whinging. They were all noisy and demanding. I felt pulled, I felt stressed. And it was after a really stressful car trip with all five kids, having to sit next to Summer and manage her behaviour full-time for about 50 minutes. I was really stretched! I felt like I was about to snap, like a war was going on inside me. And then something rose up from deep within me. Something erupted that shocked me. A groan came from my inner being and I unleashed the words, “I LOVE YOU SUMMER!” The kids looked at me shocked. And then I swiftly moved and embraced Summer and poured out love from my heart all over her. It just oozed from every pore of my being. There was such joy and freedom. And I knew this was the place that I wanted to live life every day. I had energy to move forward. I didn’t want to escape anymore. It transformed that moment for me and the kids.
If only we could live in this zone 24/7. How different life would be! I believe God gives tastes of heaven, of his goodness of his love. And then he teaches us how to live like this more and more.
And then I think of truth. God’s truth. Not the twaddle of relativism that we’ve been spoon-fed by our culture over the last few decades. I love God’s truth. It is liberating. God’s ways are the ways of freedom. If only I could shout from the city’s billboards how amazing truth is. Some luscious Scriptures come to mind… “Jesus is the way, the truth and the life” (John 14:6); “then you will know the truth and truth will set you free” (John 8:32).
But truth on its own can often come across so weakly for those who do not agree. There is so much variety of opinion in the world, that to talk about truth from the one who made it, is not received so well. And it can come across as hateful, especially when you quote verses on homosexuality, etc. It makes me sad that what is so precious and so life-giving, can seem so corrupt. And it is not!
I wrestle with how do we present this truth. I see Christians who just tell it like it is, straight as an arrow. And I see Christians who despise this approach and emphasise the need to come from love and no judgment. I look at the Scripture and I see a loving God who is straight down the line with his speech. But he oozes love 24/7 and so when it comes, it comes from a place of love.
One thing I have learnt from being married, is that skill is important to some extent. I can learn relationship skills, I can learn better ways to phrase things so that conflict goes down better. This is hard but can be worthwhile. But what is SO much more effective is when my heart is in the right place. When I ooze God’s love and I’ve been in his presence and my heart is wanting freedom for my husband as well as myself, without condemnation or judgment or unrighteous anger, THEN IT IS COMPLETELY DIFFERENT and it doesn’t matter how I say it, because what is read is far beyond words. Maybe not all of the time. But even if it is not received, I am still free. I am not fuming. I am full of love and joy. And it is certainly a lot easier for the other person to hear.
This seems all wonderfully ideal and there is lots of truth here. But I’m not 24/7 living out Jesus. And so I wrestle, with love, truth and freedom.
One thing I will finish with. When I have spoken hard stuff to people and it’s come from my own sense of timing, it hasn’t worked very well. I’ve not seen good fruit. But when the Holy Spirit has prompted me to speak hard stuff, and even though I’m scared I do it, it’s completely different. It’s been received, not necessarily followed, but seen as love.
At the end of the day, I conclude I trust God and I want him to grow me. And I want him to direct me. Because his way works. And mine doesn’t. And I want to speak his truth with love and power. That I hunger for so much!
I’m Not Ideal
I’ve been a chaser of the ideal. A lover of perfection. But I have discovered multiple times that I am considerably lacking in ideal. Haha it’s so funny. And I keep forgetting this lesson which is even funnier. And tiring!
Fortunately for me, God is ideal. Well – in His book, maybe not ours. (He’s out of the box!)
I remember the first big lesson was in the year 2000. I had finished my music and teaching degree and was in my first year of teaching full-time, secondary music and psychology. It must have been in the second half of the year, as I was tired. I was feeling worn down. It was a full-on year getting used to full-time work, but what was worse, was I was frustrated with my growth as a Christian.
I was always passionate about growing in God. As a teenager I used to have charts to tick off my Bible reading, Bible memorisation and time spend with God (TWG for short). I would set goals and pursue them for a few days or a week, then I would get distracted or lack the will and give up. Then I’d feel guilty and bad and horrible and far from God and miserable. Then after a few months, I’d connect with God wonderfully, have a big cry and write letters to my future self about how awesome it was to be in His presence, and how I needed to press through in future and not give up.
But in the future I would keep not pressing in. I would get bored. I would get tired. Then the guilt, etc, etc. Cycle after cycle.
By the year 2000 I had done this cycle lots and lots of times. And I was tired. I felt like a failure. I tried so hard but couldn’t win. Aaarrggh!!!!
Well I sat down in my loungeroom in Boronia and I decided to quit. I decided to tell God that I wasn’t giving up on him, but I was giving up on trying to grow myself, because it wasn’t working. I told God that he had to grow me, as I was giving up.
Hahahahaha. I think that’s what God was WAITING FOR!!!! He must have been shouting HALLELUJAH!
Well, later that week, a light came on in my soul. I had felt dead for a long time, so I noticed the difference. I didn’t put the light on, it just came there, and I knew God had done it in answer to my prayer. Then he put an idea in my heart to connect with a fellow teacher at the school, to ask her to mentor me in prayer. So I did what I was told, and that was great. My life started to build.
And time and time again, I watched God take the initiative. He would put something on my mind or heart and I would hear and just do it. And then life would come, then growth would come. And it was SO much easier. He led me to breakthroughs and overcoming and winning. Well not everything all at once, unfortunately for my poor impatience. But fortunately for my patience, he did things at his pace, some slow, some fast. His choice, his timing.
I learnt (and am still learning) to not worry about my imperfections, as I knew God would take care of it eventually. There was no point on me improving myself in that area, until God decided it was time to work on it. Cos then there would be grace. I learnt to trust the Holy Spirit that he knows the right timing. He’s the master craftsmen. He knows what to do and when. So delicate an operation sometimes. He’s seriously brilliant. I have watched him over and over in amazement!
I do pray and ask God’s intervention in stuff. I don’t just sit back and stare. But then I trust (or I need to trust) that he’s heard and will tackle it when he sees best. Often he does a little bit of tackling some time within that week, I think just to encourage me and let me know he’s onto it. And the more I press in with prayer, the more active he gets. So it’s definitely two way street. But without him, I may as well pick up my bat and ball and go home. Cos there will be no winning, no real life change, just a little rat going around and around the improvement wheel and getting tired!
Is This The Most Inspiring Passage in the Bible?
Psalm 84
1 How lovely is your dwelling place,
Lord Almighty!
2 My soul yearns, even faints,
for the courts of the Lord;
my heart and my flesh cry out
for the living God.
Sigh of deep relief and satisfaction! Wow. My spirit sucks in life when I read these verses. It reminds me of God’s presence and how good he is and how deep his life fills me, at those times when he overwhelms me. I am brought back to the place of inner life and sustenance and I DRINK. Hahaha. Nothing like it.
3 Even the sparrow has found a home,
and the swallow a nest for herself,
where she may have her young—
a place near your altar,
Lord Almighty, my King and my God.
Birds get a mention. I like sparrows. They’re cute and little. Feeling a bit jealous of the sparrow here. Imagine having your babies right near God’s altar. Wow. Talk about safety and atmosphere. Woopee!
4 Blessed are those who dwell in your house;
they are ever praising you.
Yep!
5 Blessed are those whose strength is in you,
whose hearts are set on pilgrimage.
Oh this is the one. One of my most favourite verses in the Bible. Inspires me to tears. HEARTS SET on PILGRIMAGE. Each word speaks volumes. It’s not your brain set on pilgrimage, it’s your HEART. Oh the innermost part that has such powerful decision making ability. The part that sees broader than the intellect, that knows what the mind cannot. And the heart is not wishy washy here. It is SET!!!!!! FIXED!!! LOCKED!!! Absolutely decided 100%, not moving away, not turning aside. Course set. No more questions! And what is it set on? Oh the joy! PILGRIMAGE. Hahahahahahahaha. Love it!
Pilgrimage. Knowing this is going to be a long journey. Knowing there are going to be many ups and downs. There will be dangers, there will be massive obstacles, there will be temptations and pitfalls, but glorious joys and the opportunity to massive overcoming. It’s a journey with God and in God and to God. And it’s terribly difficult and its amazingly liberating.
It reminds me of another of my favourite verses,
James 1:2-4 – “Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.”
It’s JOYOUS, facing the trials, because they bring GOLD that you can’t get any other way. Every trial is a privilege, an honour, an opportunity. When you go through it with God, in his ways, then you get GOLD. You get maturity, wisdom, patience, humility. Oh wow. The list can go on and on and on. And all of these things are amazingly invaluable, more precious than a mansion with big trees and gorgeous flowers. And they build and grow and bring LIFE. Cos God’s ways are smart and life bringing.
6 As they pass through the Valley of Baka,
they make it a place of springs;
the autumn rains also cover it with pools.
7 They go from strength to strength,
till each appears before God in Zion.
I can’t believe this Psalm just keeps getting more and more awesome. It’s nearly at bursting point. Talk about inspiring. As we pass through the valley of weeping, we don’t just trudge through and come out gasping. No! We make it a place of springs. We make our pain and our trial something amazing and beautiful and life bringing. Bad turns to good. Pain turns to victory. What triumph. What glory. Every trial a privilege and an honour. Let’s stop running from the pain and let’s embrace God’s path through and get true riches! And yep – this means going from strength to strength. Mighty warriors these pilgrims are. Truly satisfying way of living. Stuff of heroes!
8 Hear my prayer, Lord God Almighty;
listen to me, God of Jacob.
9 Look on our shield, O God;
look with favor on your anointed one.
Let’s keep going…
10 Better is one day in your courts
than a thousand elsewhere;
Here we go again. Drinking in the awesomeness. So TRUE. Roller coaster at theme park doesn’t compare to the presence of God.
10b I would rather be a doorkeeper in the house of my God
than dwell in the tents of the wicked.
I would rather scrub heaven’s golden streets and bask in his presence, than be queen of popularity with God haters. Seriously, we are going to be blown away when we meet Jesus face to face one day. The comparison between the house of God and the tents of the wicked will be ridiculous. Maybe like saying, hey – how would you like to lick that worm, or hey – how would you like to be served by the world’s best chef every day for the rest of your life. I wish everyone could have just a taste of God’s presence, of the inner life that he brings. He is SO much more than a belief and we don’t have to wait until heaven to experience his glory. We get tastes here and some of them are long tastes, and they change us. And you never want to go back to anything else. It’s all muck and slime in comparison!
11 For the Lord God is a sun and shield;
the Lord bestows favor and honor;
no good thing does he withhold
from those whose walk is blameless.
12 Lord Almighty,
blessed is the one who trusts in you.
Blessed, blessed, blessed. Means happy, happy, happy. Yep. When I trust him, my heart is free. When I worry – that’s not a path of life. NOT fun as I know from experience. That’s not God’s way. God’s way is trust. That’s the path of pilgrimage. That’s the path of favour and honour. That’s the path I LOVE!